May/Jun
2017

Stages of Motherhood: Who Am I?

Written by Cheri Deruiter
Print
Share

When you were born I asked myself—who am I? God has blessed me with your presence, and I promise I will care for you, keep you safe and cherish every moment I have with you. I am your mother, and I will love you with all of my heart.

TODDLER STAGE

You soon grew into a toddler, and I had a new role to learn. Again, I asked myself—who am I? I am your teacher of all things new. I am your doctor when you are ill. I am your guardian, always keeping you safe. I am your playmate, your first best friend. You can always count on me. I promise I will never give up on you. Together we can conquer any challenge. I am your momma who loves you with all of my heart.

SCHOOL YEARS

I had tears in my eyes as I sent you off to a place I would only know through the stories you would tell me at the end of the day. I had to ask myself—who am I? I am your fashion designer, your tutor for reading and math, your event coordinator, your lunch lady, your personal baker, your hair stylist, your dentist, the enforcer of rules. I am your protector when you are scared or insecure. I am trying to be a good role model. I am so proud of you. You are my life. I am your mommy who loves you with all of my heart.

You were so confident and ready for middle school, while I was the one who was scared and insecure. Once more, I found myself asking—who am I? I am your chauffeur. I am your secretary who keeps track of your busy schedule. I am your coach, your counselor, your problem solver and your inspiration. I am your mirror image: When you’re happy, I’m happy; when you’re sad, I’m sad. You are becoming your own person, and I am supportive and proud. I am your mom, and I love you with all of my heart.

When you were in high school, I asked—where did the time go?  Seems like only yesterday I was swaddling you in my arms. You have become so independent, and once again, my role is changing. I wonder—who am I? I am your accountant, your banker, your advisor, your editor and your manager. I am Kalli’s mom and Dylan’s mom, I am your best friend, your confidant, your biggest fan. I believe in you and what your future has in store for you. I want the very best for you and am willing to make sacrifices to make sure your dreams come true. You are breaking away, finding out who you are, spending more and more time away from me. But I am forever your mom, and I will always love you with all of my heart.

OFF TO COLLEGE 

I love you with all of my heart and soul, and now they tell me I have to let you go. I still ask myself and wonder—who am I? I still have yet to discover who I am to you as we go through life stages together. 

Cheri Deruiter lives in Rochester with her husband Steve of 25 years. They are enjoying spending time together since their two kids, Kalli and Dylan, went off to college.