From the Editor: Taboo Topics

“You don’t grow up until you have your first good laugh at yourself.” – Eleanor Roosevelt

Taboo topics can be embarrassing, true, provide too much information (TMI) or uncommon, unordinary, unspoken and unlikely. Are there topics that make you or your family, friends and coworkers squirm? 

There is a topic that certain friends of mine are uncomfortable talking about, and they are probably going to read this and think “Oh no, here she goes!” Yes, friends (you know who you are) we are talking about sex in this issue of Rochester Women magazine (page 15). I am not uncomfortable talking about pleasurable experiences. But I suppose some people haven’t had pleasant sexual experiences, so I understand they aren’t eager to talk (or even hear) about sex. My aunt, who has a doctorate of nursing, researched sexuality in the aging. She has taught public health nurses from coast to coast, so we can have a conversation about sexuality in a frank, healthcare provider manner. We also talk about dating and even online dating across the generations. Speaking of online dating, Danielle Teal sheds light on the now cool dating method and gives some good advice (page 54). 

There are some topics almost so embarrassing for women that we can hardly talk with our friends about them, but by talking, we will reduce stereotypes and feel less ashamed. What could these be, are you wondering? One is urinary incontinence. This started happening to me in the past few years (in my mid-40s) and, to my surprise, sometimes happens when I sneeze, cough, laugh or jump on the trampoline. I have fairly good bladder control, but it “all came out” last winter when I was letting the dog out. I slipped down the icy stairs and found myself sitting in my pretty pink fleece bathrobe in the snow laughing (or was it crying?) in a puddle of you know what. OK so now you all know, I peed my pants. It is as embarrassing for an adult as a kindergartener who doesn’t make it to the bathroom in time. Read about treatments that help women recover from urinary incontinence (page 43). 

Taboo topics can be serious or humorous. Professionally and personally speaking, there are topics that need to spoken of with care. I recommend the “need to know” rule of thumb. When speaking to or about someone else ask yourself, “Is it kind? Is it true? Is it necessary?” Timing is also critical when discussing sensitive topics. Asking yourself these questions will prevent feelings from getting hurt and preserve valuable relationships.

I hope this issue of Rochester Women gives you something to think (and talk) about!



Correction: Dr. Lucy Gores generously provided teeth whitening services for Whitney Peterson in the I Am A Beautiful Rochester Woman  feature in Rochester Women May/June 2016 Issue. She works at Lakeside Dentistry. The article incorrectly stated that she works at Lakeview Dental.